Quote of the Day
Quotes » Other Great Quote Types » Funny Quotes (Page 2)

Meaningful Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

“Have you noticed that anyone driving slower than you is an idiot and anyone driving faster than you is a maniac.”
– George Carlin

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.”
– Zsa Zsa Gabor

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.”
– Tim Allen

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }



“Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think, in a deeper voice.”
– Bill Cosby

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now-when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.”
– Jimmy Carter

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“We’ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.”
– Robert Wilensky

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”
– Rita Rudner

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his chest.”
– Roseanne Barr

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there are men on base.”
– Dave Barry

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }

“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.”
– Steven Wright

GD Star Rating
loading...

{ 0 comments }